Tobin Nageotte // June 1, 2010

Who gets this damn happy about their girlfriend’s new cat? Potential explanations of this pic’s true context:

a) Her sister is giving him a Handie outside the frame.

b) He’s on a plane…and it’s crashing. He’s actually screaming: “Why are you showing me your stupid cat?! I’m going to die!!!”

c) He just got out of a Venezuelan jail.

d) He was home schooled.

e) He’s never seen a cat before.

f) He has a huge snake named “Victor.” She’s showing him Victor’s dinner.

g) She keeps buying cats and accidentally killing them. He’s just humoring her, but inside he’s thinking: “Oh, she is definitely gonna kill that little cat.”

h) She had it stuck inside her for days after a horribly-planned “bedroom experiment” and he’s happy that she’s back to anatomic normalcy.

i) He’s actually mocking her. A moment later, he’ll scream: “Stop tying ribbons in your hair. Stop playing with kittens. Don’t you see this amazing sport coat I’m wearing in the middle of the afternoon? Grow up and put on something sexy.”